bunch o'stuff

singing at wallace memorial today

inbetween the shows of

the living christmas tree.

it was cool

then we went to

o'charley's

and i ate the

loaded potato soup

which is absolutely

TO DIE FOR

then

mr. kennedy

got the bright idea of

switching the solos with

people who didn't have one.

including me.

so i got alix's solo

it was supposed to be mine in the first place

but i chickened out

i think i did pretty good with it today though

then when i got back on the risers from singing

i broke an ornament

and it pretty much

shattered everywhere.

i freaked

but it was cleaned up

when i got back from the bathroom

...maggie's a good dog...

sorry

random

but anyways,

i'm not going to call him tonight

becasue it's a test

and yes

all those myths on movies

about girls performing all these tests

on guys and girls alike

are totally true

so this is a test.

if he cares enough about me

he'll call

if he doesn't really care whether we talk or not

he won't

cause i've been calling him

almost every night

and tonight

i won't

so we'll just wait and see what happens

btw

i finished new moon

and it was amazing

i was kinda confused about the ending though

kinda mad

kinda sad

kinda relieved

all that

i'm rally looking forward to her graduation though

for all of you

who know what i'm talking about

if you don't

go read

twilight

by stephanie meyer

it's

AMAZING

only if you like vampires

and undying love

and gore

i do

he he he

that's kind of a

contradiction

if you think about it

love vs. gore

ha ha ha

makes me laugh

so nathan's gonna be at wallace tomorrow

cause we're singing there again

and he'll be there

and he'll stalk me

if not

he'll def ask me about the letter

i think i'll pretend that

i haven't gotten it yet

that way we're not in an awkward postion

we'll be able to act normal

well

i will at least

who knows

he might just get down on one knee right there

and propose to me

again

that would be

...dreadful...

sorry nathan

but i don't want you

like you want me

i want someone else

maybe two someone elses

depending on how the 1/2

of the someone else

(a.k.a. chancery

-or-

daivd)

decides what to do tonight

like

*ahem*

call

me

if david called me

then i'd be pretty happy

i guess he might

maybe not

maybe he's one of those guys who

let's the girl lead if she started it

and i pretty much

started it

what if he is

and doesn't call?

would i be upset?

not really

just a little...

...

nostalgic??

idk what the word is

i know i would just miss him

i've missed him all day

i'm def seeing him tomorrow though

cause i've finished reading

the book he let me borrow

and i have to get it back to him

so

i'll be seeing him

what is wrong with me???

why do i worry over one person

SO MUCH???

i mean

i care about him

i just am...

...

overeacting??

idk

i'm really at a loss for words right now

but

i'll just keep

wishing that he would call

so

peace

xoxoxo